A mi entender todos tenemos problemas, situacioes y defectos, y en este blog pues estoy sacando los mios para poder hacer ... vamos a llamarlo un "inventario moral" y cojer control de lo que yo llamo "pensamientos enfermisos". Tambien me da la oportunidad de poner mis pensamientos en orden. Este blog es bien personal y bien sincero y se puede decir controvercial. No voy a estar aguantando mis cosas por dentro,



"somos tan enfermos como nuestros secretos."

This is where I am going to speak truths of my feelings. There will be a series of my poems and daily thoughts. A project on how to find inner peace or the processes one goes through to receive it. We will see if it even gets to the point of ever finding that inner peace, a soul search I guess. One that could practically kill me knowing the angry and resentful person I am..





jueves, 9 de diciembre de 2010

How to Die

On December 7 2010, the world came to an end, at least for me. I died repeatedly. First, I thought of a tsunami then an earth quack. Then I was imagining what I would do, if anything happened to my daughter or to me. If one of us lived throw it, or if we both died, I thought of the clothes we should put on, our best dresses, our nicest shoes, we would play dress up and twirl and twirl and laugh and hug, and give each other kisses and sing and dance.


I had planned my suicide if anything  happen to my baby and I lived, I planned that that day I wouldn't get dressed that when I would have to berry her I would put on my favorite dress and the shoes I so love and take my life away on her grave as I damned the gods. That I would never want any other baby but my fist and only, that my life was nothing if I did not have her. That it was better to simply end it I would not be able to live.



Children art, girl, big girl in dress, painting, child, Debra Hurd -- Debra Hurd
TO BE CONTINUED...

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